Growing Optimism

Good morning,
I have not written since 7-7-08. During this time, much has occurred but nothing has happened. I have had many good to great experiences, all in the same frame work of a static life. I continue to look for a change but do not yet see this change. Strangely, and I say strangely because this has never happened before, I feel a sense of optimism. For a long period, I have known that I wanted freedom and choice. I stifled those desires due to lack of money to facilitate my freedom and choice. Instead, I tried to talk myself into wanting a paying job; any job that paid enough. As I pursued this path, I began to realize that I was not willing to "do" just anything and I became marginally selective in my pursuit. What I have experienced is a TOTAL lack of interest in me as an employee. Now, I do understand that this is due, in part, to my middle age, but with experience under my belt, the total lack of response is interesting. Also, I know that I would be an asset in many situations applied for but none of these opportunities truly interest me. Bottom line - I am not calling them forth into my experience.

So, I am mystified by my own optimism. Am I beginning to "let go" and allow the Universal Good to work in my life? I PRAY SO !!!!! I believe that the Universal God stands ready and eager to bring forth wonderful experience for each of us. I believe that what interferes is our own fear that this is not THE TRUTH. Because the fear interferes, we do not experience only desire which then strengthens the fear interference. A vicious cycle ensues. Extreme Trust is the only needed ingredient to break the vicious cycle. I am convinced that once broken and the gift of desire is experienced personally, all of life will be as God intended. This is the foundation of my optimism!!~

I am more motivated than ever to "let go". I am loosing my attachment to ego and believing more in the unseen. I pray that the vastness of the unseen is far more powerful that my minuscule ego, to which I have given incredible power. I ask! Thank you.

Peace to the world